Trouble with teenagers?

                                             Photo from tinypic

A couple of years ago, one of my good friends was having a lot of trouble agreeing with her growing teenager and she was at wits end on what to do as they were always arguing or shouting at the other. She mentioned it to me and I suggested she try the method I use with my students when they test my patience.

This is what I usually do. When a student misbehave, after a couple of warnings, we can withdraw them to another room. Instead of threatening them with "You either behave or you are out of here!" which is usually our very first reaction, I will use," You have a choice. You can behave yourself and stay in the classroom or you can go for timeout." Nine out of ten times, the students will say," I'm sorry, I will be good for the rest of the period and I want to stay."

My friend used this same method and gave his son choices and she called it the enpowerment!
She said it worked really well! Now she is getting along fine with her son.  She was really grateful for this tip so I thought I'll share it with you!

The method works because they think we are giving them a choice and they are choosing what they want to do! But instead you are giving them the choices you want so whichever they pick it will be one of your preference!   In my years of teaching, so far only one senior student caught on to my method, i.e. they really do not have a choice at all!   Either one they pick, you still win!